Do YOU know "How to Think"?

Are YOU are a THINKER. Test your skills!

Thinking is a seldom discussed but important basic skill that all life forms rely upon to help navigate everything. Even human beings use a version of thinking as a necessary first step in carrying out whatever they hope to accomplish on any given day. But who among us has not become increasingly worried that the art and craft of thinking seems to have seriously deteriorated among humans in recent years. It has become difficult to ignore that certain large factions of our society appear to have dispensed with the idea of thinking entirely.

Obviously there is no simple way to correct this growing problem. But toward that end, I have created this very basic refresher course that is intended to help people who are too ashamed to admit that they have completely stopped thinking but would secretly like to begin the process again.

This bronze statue that Auguste Rodin sculpted in 1904 is called ‘The Thinker ‘(Le Penseur) and is perhaps the most famous symbolic depiction of the act of thinking ever made by a human. It shows us a man who is so lost in thought that he went outside without his clothes, sat down on a tree stump and then forgot to go back inside and get dressed. Perhaps that was fine in 1904 but in the ensuing 120 years, experts have determined that sitting nude on a tree stump is not really the optimum situation for a newcomer to restart a dormant thinking process.

LET’S START our class with a POP QUIZ.

QUESTION: This woman with the troubled look in her eyes seems to be having a difficult time producing a thought. What is the cause of her consternation?

Why is this woman having so much trouble thinking?

Yet, this man is employing many of the very same techniques: the ‘furrowed brow, the hand on the face, the eyes gazing upward.’ So why do we give him credit for being more successful in his quest to jump start the process of thinking? WHY?

Does he instantly get more credit for ‘thinking’ because he “ identifies as a man” or does it have something to do with THE DIRECTION THAT HE IS GAZING?????

Answer: Both. But experts now agree that…

As with any new exercise regime, it’s best to begin with a warm up. By getting into the optimum “thinking position” we are waking the brain and reminding it to start the thinking process. The brain is more open to this BEFORE it encounters any of the daunting ordeals it faces when deciding whether to even bother making contact with an actual thought.

These people are demonstrating the act of preparing to think.

There is a right way and a wrong way to get into the optimum “thinking position.”

At a distance, the people on the right side of the chart may appear to be doing as much “thinking” as the people on the left. But do not be fooled. Experts agree that the more befuddled the facial expression selected for use during the warm up, the less likely the chances that any contact will be made with what we commonly refer to as “thoughts.”

There are two equally effective go-to warm-up positions that aid the approach to a thought. For reasons that science can not explain, many people have success by placing one finger somewhere near the mouth.

For bonus points, which of these people is most likely to be producing actual thoughts right now? Hint: the man in the blue shirt is looking up at an OTB board. Does this qualify as ‘thinking?

The second proven ‘thinking warm-up technique’ involves the holding of the chin. It works best when eye contact with The Thought (located above and to the right.) is also maintained.

Now see if you can spot which of the men in the diagram below are actually producing thoughts.

If you guessed ‘NONE. Zero.” CONGRATULATIONS! None of these men will succeed in making contact with any kind of a thought. Q. Can you spot what they are all doing wrong? A. Not one of them is looking up and to the right, where all the thoughts are located. And of course, they are also indulging in a very common if narcissistic mistake: Theatrical Finger Pointing.

POP QUIZ #1:

Q. What is this woman doing? Is it a form of thinking? By doing this, will she eventually produce a thought?

A. No. A slap to the forehead will not a thought generate. What she is doing is sometimes referred to as “comedic acting.’ Originally seen in silent films, this antiquated method of supposedly showing that you are thinking has never been known to make contact with an actual thought.

POP QUIZ #2:

Q. Are any of the following people showing signs of “thinking?”.

POP Quiz #3:

By now, you should be growing adept at spotting what it LOOKS like when someone is making contact with a thought. Test your developing skill on this brain teaser.

POP QUIZ#4:

100 BONUS EXTRA CREDIT POINTS: