From Andy Prieboy to Roy Batty, men want more life and are hopeless romantics...Just struggling, randomly
to hold back the brush fire of time with pocketable possessions from critical moments.
I would go to the Prieboy museum and watch as Andy's virtual head appeared to tell the tale of the tire nail as I picked it up. Feel the weight of the melted cassettes. If you have seen one set of jugs and some butts have you seen them all? What's a few magazines? They're thin.
I cant toss that million page baseball encyclopedia with that black and white picture of jilisa
from college inside. Stamped the high heeled shit out of my heart, cooked it, put it on toast and served it and I said, " thanks, it tastes good."
It's in my office next to my old organic chemistry lab notes on synthesizing non pharmaceutical grade aspirin. A lab I was late to more than once, due to watching you on tv weekday mornings, perspiring through your t shirt and being funny as hell. With new material everyday,
I too live with and love a ... "collector." I am extremely understanding about this but my biggest beef is the frantic guarding against throwing away when you don't actually KNOW what you HAVE.
And believe it or not, I have heard that exact same argument for the crap reminding or sparking a memory that otherwise might have been otherwise lost forever. But if you never again remembered the night you ordered the Moo Shoo Pancakes (soy sauce stained napkin notwithstanding) that might somehow be okay, in my book.
If you love (whatever it is) sooo much, please! Take it out of storage/those boxes and display it. Use it. Photograph it. Otherwise, what is it for?? As you very wisely observe, not every moment in life has to be chronicled alongside a (weird) object. (Really enjoyed this clever Socratic take on downsizing lol)
Our house is a small weird object museum. And I gotta admit that half of it is mine. But I wasnt moving IN. I was already in residence. So I didnt have to pay any attention to my critique!
I gotta side with Andy on this one (as long as there are still comfy spaces for the dogs). As a former music journalist, I have so much stuff that is important to me and probably no one else on the planet (except for the musicians maybe). Like a Prince votive candle. A squishy ball that was sent for some reason with a demo cassette. And yes, and entire four drawer file cabinet of bios (printed! ) press photos of bands I wrote about. When I'm dead my nephews get the house. They should have to do something to earn it! Lol
“That’s why I plan to shove it into a closet and let you deal with it after I’m gone. If a man can’t leave his mark, at least he can leave his crap.”
That is exactly what my father did. My brother filled *six* large dumpsters and that was just the detached, two-story, three-car garage. There are three attic sections in the house, crammed full. And you can’t really move in the spare “bedroom” or his office. Dad passed last August at 92 and we haven’t made much progress going through all of his papers and stuff. It’s overwhelming.
There is. He brought back from wonderful objects from Okinawa when he was in the Navy at the end of the Korean War. There are many photographs of both sides of the family. Lots of antique tools, vacuum tubes, transistors and resistors, instruction manuals for electric razors that are from the 1960s…
Love this! I don’t know Andy, but he thinks just like me. I understand the saving of the screw… I have a baggie with a couple in them with their own stories. & old bills & on & on. The “obstacle course” now in my tiny apt in N Hollywood & though I have a limited budget, I am sending checks every month for my storages in Texas… that have been untouched for many years now. Long story. Makes no sense. & makes me have anxiety just to think of it, so I try not to.
This is likely my favorite so far, it it comes at very poignant time for me in my current time in my life.
I'm pretty sure I like Andy. And I think he is likely better suited to spar with you than I....
But I can really relate to what you are saying and it is so applicable to my personal situation.
For starters; there is apparently a loving relationship between you two weirdos. That makes the scenario different than mine, although I feel that I have been there, done that.
I need to bail from my current situation. I am over whelmed by trying to just figure out these same enigmas as you and Andy are wrestling with. I don't have the benefit/detriment of a girlfriend/lover I am trying to connect with. But I still have close to 70 years worth of living I need to deal with.
An old girlfriend/lover that is still near and dear to me suggests: Just walk! Leave it ALL behind. And I can see the liberating value of that. But as Andy suggests, these trails of your life are unique to you and will disappear when you are gone. And usually you are closed to these experiences/memories and it is probably even less likely that your life fragments are going to be interpretable or meaningful to anyone else...
I don't want to discourage my fellow man, Andy, but he might have a unique opportunity here... I would let you try to straighten me out!
I could use someone like you, Merrill, to shape my ass up!!
Not sure what you are going through, Perry. Except that you "need to bail from current situation" and a friend told you "Just walk." But Andy and I are both crazy collectors of stuff and our discussion was really about the fact that he was moving in to my house, which was already filled to the brim with MY weird collections. One of us should have pointed that out I guess. Also, we have been together 20 something years since he moved in. We weren't really fighting. We were writing. As far as your situation...as a survivor of multiple relationships before this one, I have to say that waking up every day in a stressful situation that you think you have to "bail" from is seldom a good way to continue living. If it seems impossible to move thru, may I suggest either therapy or alanon since both will give you the kind of advice you need to put one foot in front of the other. Therapy can be expensive but has been very very helpful to me over the years. Alanon, on the other hand, is free and addresses many of the same relationship issues with common sense and an understanding of human psychology. I hope you figure this out. The butterflies need you.
My wife and I have a partial solution. If we buy something new for "the house" we throw out something old that fits the same category.
As for that biscuit. They need to think productively. Here would be the best way to treat it, instead of wasting money and space to preserve it in a museum:
Have someone smear it with a very aged Camembert, auction it off, have the winner eat it, and shit it away! That way it would get a much-appreciated royal sendoff. and the museum would enrich its coffers.
I think my version of this solution would be to smear it with a very aged Camembert and then build a whole new display case explaining it with photos that documented the process. I think that is because I would not want to be sued by the family of the person who died eating a 250 year old biscuit. And also I got a masters degree in art.
I never wanted to be married. Chalk it up to 2x44 years. I throw “stuff” away constantly. Also sneak my husband’s stash. He’s a bit of a hoarder. More clothes and shoes than I . Elegant suits and tailored shirts with his initials on cuffs . Midwest Ohio boy Ivy grad made good . I, Bhills lass couldn’t give a damn. Anyhoo!??? I use the word all the time . Borrowed from my mother . Did you borrow too ? Enjoyed your story.
After the last fire in our area, we got a storage unit. It helps a lot but not remotely as much as I expected and it took almost no time to fill it up!
Merrill, as I was (belatedly) reading this piece, my brain kept saying, "Storage unit! Storage unit!" But I pictured it being just for Andy's stuff. I read this with great interest (although belatedly) because I accumulate stuff and really only go through it all when I'm moving. And even then, I get rid of just a third of what I should. Now I'm in a house with a spacious basement and am probably never moving again, so the question is, will I tackle this stuff while I'm still alive and physically able? Or will my heirs need to do it? P.S. I hope no fires will attack you again.
The storage unit is MOSTLY Andy's stuff....because I safe small things and also photos and things printed on paper....and he has cassettes and musical instruments and "gear". But it certainly makes evacuating from a fire easier since it reduces what matters to me down to animals and outfits. And of the two, only animals REALLY matter to me. So my philosophy is get rid of lots of what you wouldn't put into the car when evacuating from a fire.
I think of myself as a Merrill. I am sure, however, that my wife thinks of me as an Andy.
And I have to confess that I have SO much crazy crap that I wont throw away. But I was in the house first!!
From Andy Prieboy to Roy Batty, men want more life and are hopeless romantics...Just struggling, randomly
to hold back the brush fire of time with pocketable possessions from critical moments.
I would go to the Prieboy museum and watch as Andy's virtual head appeared to tell the tale of the tire nail as I picked it up. Feel the weight of the melted cassettes. If you have seen one set of jugs and some butts have you seen them all? What's a few magazines? They're thin.
I cant toss that million page baseball encyclopedia with that black and white picture of jilisa
from college inside. Stamped the high heeled shit out of my heart, cooked it, put it on toast and served it and I said, " thanks, it tastes good."
It's in my office next to my old organic chemistry lab notes on synthesizing non pharmaceutical grade aspirin. A lab I was late to more than once, due to watching you on tv weekday mornings, perspiring through your t shirt and being funny as hell. With new material everyday,
The hunt for new funny. Make way for the future!!
I have to go google Roy Batty.
Blade Runner....4 year lifespan 😊
I too live with and love a ... "collector." I am extremely understanding about this but my biggest beef is the frantic guarding against throwing away when you don't actually KNOW what you HAVE.
And believe it or not, I have heard that exact same argument for the crap reminding or sparking a memory that otherwise might have been otherwise lost forever. But if you never again remembered the night you ordered the Moo Shoo Pancakes (soy sauce stained napkin notwithstanding) that might somehow be okay, in my book.
If you love (whatever it is) sooo much, please! Take it out of storage/those boxes and display it. Use it. Photograph it. Otherwise, what is it for?? As you very wisely observe, not every moment in life has to be chronicled alongside a (weird) object. (Really enjoyed this clever Socratic take on downsizing lol)
Our house is a small weird object museum. And I gotta admit that half of it is mine. But I wasnt moving IN. I was already in residence. So I didnt have to pay any attention to my critique!
thank you for the shout out! and love it as always that impossible throw away screw…. sigh
I gotta side with Andy on this one (as long as there are still comfy spaces for the dogs). As a former music journalist, I have so much stuff that is important to me and probably no one else on the planet (except for the musicians maybe). Like a Prince votive candle. A squishy ball that was sent for some reason with a demo cassette. And yes, and entire four drawer file cabinet of bios (printed! ) press photos of bands I wrote about. When I'm dead my nephews get the house. They should have to do something to earn it! Lol
“That’s why I plan to shove it into a closet and let you deal with it after I’m gone. If a man can’t leave his mark, at least he can leave his crap.”
That is exactly what my father did. My brother filled *six* large dumpsters and that was just the detached, two-story, three-car garage. There are three attic sections in the house, crammed full. And you can’t really move in the spare “bedroom” or his office. Dad passed last August at 92 and we haven’t made much progress going through all of his papers and stuff. It’s overwhelming.
Fun! Is there anything at all worth saving in all that clutter? Did Dad have any kind of an eye for art or collectibles or books or...anything?
There is. He brought back from wonderful objects from Okinawa when he was in the Navy at the end of the Korean War. There are many photographs of both sides of the family. Lots of antique tools, vacuum tubes, transistors and resistors, instruction manuals for electric razors that are from the 1960s…
Well, that all sounds pretty interesting. I'm glad there is SOME payoff for all your hard work.
Love this! I don’t know Andy, but he thinks just like me. I understand the saving of the screw… I have a baggie with a couple in them with their own stories. & old bills & on & on. The “obstacle course” now in my tiny apt in N Hollywood & though I have a limited budget, I am sending checks every month for my storages in Texas… that have been untouched for many years now. Long story. Makes no sense. & makes me have anxiety just to think of it, so I try not to.
Thanks for the stories❤️❤️
If you haven’t watched the documentary “So Late So Soon,” I recommend it.
Trailer: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=bc6PJF7JKwo
Oh, Merrill!
This is likely my favorite so far, it it comes at very poignant time for me in my current time in my life.
I'm pretty sure I like Andy. And I think he is likely better suited to spar with you than I....
But I can really relate to what you are saying and it is so applicable to my personal situation.
For starters; there is apparently a loving relationship between you two weirdos. That makes the scenario different than mine, although I feel that I have been there, done that.
I need to bail from my current situation. I am over whelmed by trying to just figure out these same enigmas as you and Andy are wrestling with. I don't have the benefit/detriment of a girlfriend/lover I am trying to connect with. But I still have close to 70 years worth of living I need to deal with.
An old girlfriend/lover that is still near and dear to me suggests: Just walk! Leave it ALL behind. And I can see the liberating value of that. But as Andy suggests, these trails of your life are unique to you and will disappear when you are gone. And usually you are closed to these experiences/memories and it is probably even less likely that your life fragments are going to be interpretable or meaningful to anyone else...
I don't want to discourage my fellow man, Andy, but he might have a unique opportunity here... I would let you try to straighten me out!
I could use someone like you, Merrill, to shape my ass up!!
Not sure what you are going through, Perry. Except that you "need to bail from current situation" and a friend told you "Just walk." But Andy and I are both crazy collectors of stuff and our discussion was really about the fact that he was moving in to my house, which was already filled to the brim with MY weird collections. One of us should have pointed that out I guess. Also, we have been together 20 something years since he moved in. We weren't really fighting. We were writing. As far as your situation...as a survivor of multiple relationships before this one, I have to say that waking up every day in a stressful situation that you think you have to "bail" from is seldom a good way to continue living. If it seems impossible to move thru, may I suggest either therapy or alanon since both will give you the kind of advice you need to put one foot in front of the other. Therapy can be expensive but has been very very helpful to me over the years. Alanon, on the other hand, is free and addresses many of the same relationship issues with common sense and an understanding of human psychology. I hope you figure this out. The butterflies need you.
My wife and I have a partial solution. If we buy something new for "the house" we throw out something old that fits the same category.
As for that biscuit. They need to think productively. Here would be the best way to treat it, instead of wasting money and space to preserve it in a museum:
Have someone smear it with a very aged Camembert, auction it off, have the winner eat it, and shit it away! That way it would get a much-appreciated royal sendoff. and the museum would enrich its coffers.
You're welcome.
I think my version of this solution would be to smear it with a very aged Camembert and then build a whole new display case explaining it with photos that documented the process. I think that is because I would not want to be sued by the family of the person who died eating a 250 year old biscuit. And also I got a masters degree in art.
ANYHOO.
I never wanted to be married. Chalk it up to 2x44 years. I throw “stuff” away constantly. Also sneak my husband’s stash. He’s a bit of a hoarder. More clothes and shoes than I . Elegant suits and tailored shirts with his initials on cuffs . Midwest Ohio boy Ivy grad made good . I, Bhills lass couldn’t give a damn. Anyhoo!??? I use the word all the time . Borrowed from my mother . Did you borrow too ? Enjoyed your story.
Thanks. I borrowed Anyhoo from my friend the comedian Laura Kightlinger!
Say hi de ho to Laura. Obviously? Irish. Must be an ol Tyme nicety . My mother’s maiden name. Murphy.
Great essay, but Andy is so wrong! The plural of opus is opera. He's lost all credibility and any benefit of doubt!
As anyone that has ever combined households can attest to the struggle (which is REAL), this was such a marvelous essay. Thanks to you and Andy!
After the last fire in our area, we got a storage unit. It helps a lot but not remotely as much as I expected and it took almost no time to fill it up!
Merrill, as I was (belatedly) reading this piece, my brain kept saying, "Storage unit! Storage unit!" But I pictured it being just for Andy's stuff. I read this with great interest (although belatedly) because I accumulate stuff and really only go through it all when I'm moving. And even then, I get rid of just a third of what I should. Now I'm in a house with a spacious basement and am probably never moving again, so the question is, will I tackle this stuff while I'm still alive and physically able? Or will my heirs need to do it? P.S. I hope no fires will attack you again.
The storage unit is MOSTLY Andy's stuff....because I safe small things and also photos and things printed on paper....and he has cassettes and musical instruments and "gear". But it certainly makes evacuating from a fire easier since it reduces what matters to me down to animals and outfits. And of the two, only animals REALLY matter to me. So my philosophy is get rid of lots of what you wouldn't put into the car when evacuating from a fire.