37 Comments
User's avatar
Gaines's avatar

This is so complex and funny and impressive and only something that could come from Merrill

Merrill Markoe's avatar

Only because I beat you to it,Gaines (year after year after year)

Jeff Tiedrich's avatar

oh my god I fucking love this post. merry Christmas, Merrill

Maura Brown's avatar

This is the funniest thing I have ever read.

Thank you.

kat's avatar

Every year I am excited to see what Mr Dylan has for his Xmas lights. It brings me such joy during a stressful time and I truly thank you for making this a refreshing Christmas tradition.

Aari's avatar

Returning to this this year is the only act of pure holiday joy I expect to experience.

Cat Cafe's avatar

So, so good MM. Love it! CC a/k/a PP

Ruth Ann Harnisch's avatar

Why do you work so hard, give us so much astonishing original content, and refuse to take our pledged subscription money? Are you waiting until you can debut with the biggest number in Substack history? I believe you can do it if that’s your goal.

You’ve been a hero of mine for decades & I appreciate your talent & efforts.

Clyde Kaplan's avatar

I think the current Christmas lights symbolizes Dylan’s switch from playing different songs at every show to now playing a fixed set list nightly.

Merrill Markoe's avatar

i think you are right. Also perhaps he started taking effexor.

Bill Southern's avatar

Bob’s electric lights are interesting. . .but, I prefer the acoustic version.

Good Jonathan's avatar

You know who else won a Nobel? John Nash, in 1994, for “pioneering analysis of equilibria in the theory of non-cooperative games.” John Nash was more famous in the non-genius world for having schizophrenia, which made him seek and interpret hidden patterns in things where no patterns actually existed. Yup, he’s the “beautiful mind” guy. My point being that Merrill is a genius sans schizophrenia. She walks right up to that line, but hold on to your hat! Her superpower - humor - kicks in. Her analysis of equilibria in hedge Christmas lights makes us laugh with muy gusto. Heck yeah she deserves a Nobel Prize. And all the other prizes.

Merrill Markoe's avatar

Damn. Thank you for the lovely complement. But spoiler alert: "Pioneering analysis of hedge equilibria:" was going to be my next substack entry. I hope your compliment didn't give too much away. Nevertheless, have a lovely Christmas Eve Jonathan P. A

brian m's avatar

I had heard rumors of the Dylan Light Interpretation by Markoe but was never sure it was real.

It is, and it explained everything!!

Surely this will push you over the top for that Nobel in Science or at least a Carnegie Prize.

This one goes out to my entire email address book ( thus saving me thousands in gifts)

Sincere thanks, i loved it

Brian M

Karl Straub's avatar

Okay, i am crawling slowly back toward reading humor, and this essay has helped a lot. Among other benefits, it reminded me of something truly wonderful.

(this next bit actually happened, it’s not a joke) i had a student a few years back who was under the impression that they had given the Nobel Prize for Literature to Billy Joel.

Merrill Markoe's avatar

He got it for "Big Shot."

bo behrens's avatar

He got it for ‶Big Shot.”

Dale Leopold's avatar

Tangled Up in Green. Fantastic!

Teri Simonds's avatar

This is brilliant! So scholarly in its interpretation of the intersection of Mr. Dylan’s holiday lights and his life.

Lily's avatar

Don't we all start out with this exact hope in our heart, chosing the branch to clip the first light onto.

"And thus did he create a deeply personal self-portrait in lights that told the tale of the triumphs, and tragedies he faced as he continued to move forward with his Never-Ending-Tour, undaunted in the face of an possible apolcaylpse."

Merrill Markoe's avatar

Haaa. And um.....yes.