Fun fact:the only known footage of Lemmo is a bit part in 'Duck Soup'.He played an insurance salesman that loses his s*** when Harpo pretends to fall asleep during his spiel to Groucho.The scene was later cut,and the footage was retrieved by a sharp eyed gaffer.It resurfaced at an auction in Van Nuys sometime in the late 80s and sold for $25 to a retired soda jerk.
My all-time favorite waiting room story. I was once in the ER waiting room with a badly sprained ankle. There was an out-of-control six year-old, running around making noise and being a general nuisance. At one point, he ran up to the big swinging doors where the doctors push the gurneys through and as he ran directly in front of the door, BAM, the doors flung open, sending the kid flying about 5 feet backwards. Waiting room erupted in laughter and applause. (Chef’s kiss.)
Thank you for this handy guide. There are a number of times I could have really used it, but now it is laminated and tucked into my hidden money belt so I'm good to go. Also very glad to hear the bearer of the stents is doing well.
I wish I had this advice while waiting for my husband’s prostatectomy to be over. I figured three hours, but it took five. Talk about anxiety-inducing! I’m glad the surgery was successful and that he recovers quickly. Five stents sounds like a lot of stents!
I love your work and have done for decades: you just get better all the time. I, too, have done my duty in a million--or so it seems--waiting rooms for loved ones and you are, as usual, bang-on about the rank awfulness of them. Am forwarding this to my sister, who also sits and waits. xoxo
Getting punchy were we? That's ok. For everyone's information, I went to my hospital for routine bloodwork. I had an appointment first thing in the morning, there were so many people in there. I was patient. I talked to a woman who had been a "walk in" and had been waiting 45 minutes.
I got called in and sat another 15 min. in what I would call a "draw station". There were five little divided porticos. My lab tech finally showed up and we talked about the wait, which he was apologizing for, and for which I wasn't upset. He said yeah, we usually have five techs doing blood draws but in the last two weeks we have lost a lot of them. (Most of the hospital staff is Latino). So why are they not showing up to work at the hospital? Anyone? Anyone?`
How much did I love this piece? Very, very, much. Almost as much as I've loved every other blog post of yours since I began reading them, which is saying quite a lot. Oh, and I loved your briefcase, too, and tried to zoom in on it to see if it was made of flannel but was unable to discern as much. Anyway, I think I'm seeing a pattern in your oeuvre and it is that the more anxious you are about something, the funnier your writing about it will be. If that axiom is true, my levels of anxiety--notable as they are--do not begin to approach yours, and I'm sorry for both of us about that. I keep complimenting your writing but honestly, the way you seamlessly incorporate art into your pieces goes far beyond "mere" writing. These times have exponentially upped the ante of what it takes to make me laugh and you, my dear, never let me down. Brava!
Congrats, mazel tov and glad to hear the patient ( and you!) are both doing well.
When the Napa Valley Vintners was one of my clients I was fortunate enough to meet one of the inventors of one of the stents in major use world wide. He was from Argentina, did his research at U of Texas and does have stents of his own design in his body. He and his wife have a kind of routine when they would tell the story of how he got his stent(s). After he retired from his research he purchased land in Napa, started growing grapes and making wine. He and his stent(s) are doing fine years later.
I’m not in a hospital waiting room reading this, but I am sitting in a vacant house to determine if the AC is working so I might see if I can use any of these tips to get me through this tour of duty.
Not dissimilar but in its way more challenging since there are no snack bars and I guess you are in all the photos of the board of directors. Good luck.
Whenever I get a notification that one of your posts is up, I drop everything to read it. (As you can guess, my life is pretty boring.) This was as funny as usual and so glad hubby is doing well. Also, extreme tangent, but your gray messenger bag with the red trim is fab. Can I ask where you got it?
Fun fact:the only known footage of Lemmo is a bit part in 'Duck Soup'.He played an insurance salesman that loses his s*** when Harpo pretends to fall asleep during his spiel to Groucho.The scene was later cut,and the footage was retrieved by a sharp eyed gaffer.It resurfaced at an auction in Van Nuys sometime in the late 80s and sold for $25 to a retired soda jerk.
Somehow none of this surprises me at all.
My all-time favorite waiting room story. I was once in the ER waiting room with a badly sprained ankle. There was an out-of-control six year-old, running around making noise and being a general nuisance. At one point, he ran up to the big swinging doors where the doctors push the gurneys through and as he ran directly in front of the door, BAM, the doors flung open, sending the kid flying about 5 feet backwards. Waiting room erupted in laughter and applause. (Chef’s kiss.)
And I guess his mother ran off to file law suits?
Thank you for this handy guide. There are a number of times I could have really used it, but now it is laminated and tucked into my hidden money belt so I'm good to go. Also very glad to hear the bearer of the stents is doing well.
I'm glad the procedure went well, Merrill!
At what point does it become a "Festial O' Stents" and where does that extra "F" go?
Thank you Merrill! I’m looking forward to my first stent someday? Love you for making life so Fun!!👍♥️.Happy healing Andy!🙏👍♥️💋.
Thanks Gayle! Aww.
I wish I had this advice while waiting for my husband’s prostatectomy to be over. I figured three hours, but it took five. Talk about anxiety-inducing! I’m glad the surgery was successful and that he recovers quickly. Five stents sounds like a lot of stents!
Yes. That is what we said. “Well, that is A LOT of STENTS!” but turns out the record is 36!
I love your work and have done for decades: you just get better all the time. I, too, have done my duty in a million--or so it seems--waiting rooms for loved ones and you are, as usual, bang-on about the rank awfulness of them. Am forwarding this to my sister, who also sits and waits. xoxo
Lemmo made me laugh so hard. Look close—I think he might be Margaret Dumont’s grandson.
Getting punchy were we? That's ok. For everyone's information, I went to my hospital for routine bloodwork. I had an appointment first thing in the morning, there were so many people in there. I was patient. I talked to a woman who had been a "walk in" and had been waiting 45 minutes.
I got called in and sat another 15 min. in what I would call a "draw station". There were five little divided porticos. My lab tech finally showed up and we talked about the wait, which he was apologizing for, and for which I wasn't upset. He said yeah, we usually have five techs doing blood draws but in the last two weeks we have lost a lot of them. (Most of the hospital staff is Latino). So why are they not showing up to work at the hospital? Anyone? Anyone?`
How much did I love this piece? Very, very, much. Almost as much as I've loved every other blog post of yours since I began reading them, which is saying quite a lot. Oh, and I loved your briefcase, too, and tried to zoom in on it to see if it was made of flannel but was unable to discern as much. Anyway, I think I'm seeing a pattern in your oeuvre and it is that the more anxious you are about something, the funnier your writing about it will be. If that axiom is true, my levels of anxiety--notable as they are--do not begin to approach yours, and I'm sorry for both of us about that. I keep complimenting your writing but honestly, the way you seamlessly incorporate art into your pieces goes far beyond "mere" writing. These times have exponentially upped the ante of what it takes to make me laugh and you, my dear, never let me down. Brava!
That may be the nicest compliment i ever got. Thank you BKL.
I have to start getting stoned again
Sorry to report I went thru it all completely sober.
It helps just use eye drops so you don't look like a red eyed monster. My tip. ahahhaha
Congrats, mazel tov and glad to hear the patient ( and you!) are both doing well.
When the Napa Valley Vintners was one of my clients I was fortunate enough to meet one of the inventors of one of the stents in major use world wide. He was from Argentina, did his research at U of Texas and does have stents of his own design in his body. He and his wife have a kind of routine when they would tell the story of how he got his stent(s). After he retired from his research he purchased land in Napa, started growing grapes and making wine. He and his stent(s) are doing fine years later.
Get your stents while you still can!
I’m not in a hospital waiting room reading this, but I am sitting in a vacant house to determine if the AC is working so I might see if I can use any of these tips to get me through this tour of duty.
Not dissimilar but in its way more challenging since there are no snack bars and I guess you are in all the photos of the board of directors. Good luck.
Whenever I get a notification that one of your posts is up, I drop everything to read it. (As you can guess, my life is pretty boring.) This was as funny as usual and so glad hubby is doing well. Also, extreme tangent, but your gray messenger bag with the red trim is fab. Can I ask where you got it?
That you like it will make the hubby’s day. He bought it for my for my birthday. I will ask him.
Thanks!
They are on etsy. Under 17 " school satchel, gray work bag. He says you can find them cheaper than the one these cues trigger. BP studio design.
Ooh, thank you. And thank the husband. Wishing him a quick recovery!
hey that's another waiting room activity!