I am wondering how you were able to take the time to be writing a lovely comment to me away from creating the streaming mini-series about you that HAS to be in development by now. Or maybe its delayed because of the strike. Who are you hoping is going to play YOU?
We live in the high desert and have a large, fully- enclosed cat patio (a catio, if you will), and our youngest cat brings in at least 3 mice a week, plus untold amounts of lizards and the occasional centipede.
I have gotten fairly adept at catching these critters. The trick is getting them away from the adorable ruthless predators before they inflict fatal injuries. I'd say my success rate is about 70%.
That’s a wonderful story and I’m glad everyone arrived safely at their destinations.
The cats brought in a chipmunk once (he sounded like a chirping bird!). I locked him in my home office and gave him water, nuts, fresh cherries, and other delicacies. It took several days before he (they?) entered the Hav-a-Hart trap. Not knowing the rule of ten, I released him (them?) in the backyard. I miss that little critter. So do the cats. 🐿️
Once borrowed a friend's tarantula for story hour and the drive took a lot longer than usual because no way was I going to take a sharp turn and jostle the lid on the tank. Still had to worry about sudden stops. Oh, and the kids were not impressed. Do not recommend.
A tale well told that both delighted and terrified me. Decades ago, I had a trap like that for mice and loaned it to a friend who didn't quite have his shit together. It was more of a metal box than a cage, and he caught a mouse and then left the trap sitting on his stove and... I think you can guess how things went after that. So he was more Joseph Goebbels than you were for sure, if that gives you any comfort.
And this made me actually, literally laugh out loud:
“Honey…Don’t get too comfortable . You have to get back in the car and drive me 10 miles from here so I can relocate a rat.”
Sadly, he died several years ago. Sorry for the downer reply... I loved this post and it made me remember both his great qualities and his bad ones as I quivered with rat-related terror.
I hate myself for laughing so hard at the Curly of the Three Stooges sounds. Which you wrote so perfectly, I could see him.
And you didn’t scream when Citizen 🐀 was on your shoulder. Or the hub’s.
You are brave, kind, loving and compassionate. And hysterically funny.
You do get the Pizza 🍕 🐀 Rat Humane Award of the Century.
And now, thanks to you, I know why the rat I dropped off in 1976 about 20 blocks from my apartment in Park Slope only one mile)returned. Love between animals and their humans is a beautiful thing.
Merrill, you sure do tell a good story. It has everything, empathy, a wild animal, a couples argument in the middle of the night, and the mistaken notion that rat cage locks are infallible. I laughed, I cried, I suddenly craved cheese.
Love this story. I once had an unexpectedly loose ferret run under my brake pedal, which caused obvious problems, but at least he was my (totally plague-free) ferret!
I'm a bit late to the party but this is one of the best stories ever. At the moment I am feeding a tiny little mouse under my dresser in hopes that I will be able to capture and relocate it later. I'm in a hotel for the elderly and do not tell anyone as they will think horrible thoughts about me. There were two but the janitor set traps and when I found the one murdered, I threw the traps away. I fed feral cats and raccoons in the woods for 30 years before I moved here so I can't help myself. Anyway....thanks for the delightful read.
Can't talk right now. I am headed off to take cheerleading lessons.
You've done it again, Merrill! You ARE the Hans Christian Anderson of our Generation!
Haaaaa. I guess if there HAS to be one, I should accept the job. But I have a feeling it doesnt offer any medical or dental.
But you DO receive immortality. There's that, Merrill.
I am wondering how you were able to take the time to be writing a lovely comment to me away from creating the streaming mini-series about you that HAS to be in development by now. Or maybe its delayed because of the strike. Who are you hoping is going to play YOU?
We were thinking YOU would play the young E. Jean, Merrill.
Hahaha. This is a wonderful tail ... uh ... TALE.
We live in the high desert and have a large, fully- enclosed cat patio (a catio, if you will), and our youngest cat brings in at least 3 mice a week, plus untold amounts of lizards and the occasional centipede.
I have gotten fairly adept at catching these critters. The trick is getting them away from the adorable ruthless predators before they inflict fatal injuries. I'd say my success rate is about 70%.
Loved your story, Merrill.
That’s a wonderful story and I’m glad everyone arrived safely at their destinations.
The cats brought in a chipmunk once (he sounded like a chirping bird!). I locked him in my home office and gave him water, nuts, fresh cherries, and other delicacies. It took several days before he (they?) entered the Hav-a-Hart trap. Not knowing the rule of ten, I released him (them?) in the backyard. I miss that little critter. So do the cats. 🐿️
Once borrowed a friend's tarantula for story hour and the drive took a lot longer than usual because no way was I going to take a sharp turn and jostle the lid on the tank. Still had to worry about sudden stops. Oh, and the kids were not impressed. Do not recommend.
You are a comic genius. AND Oskar Schindler.
Thank you and also HI JENNY!
Omg
Love reading your work. ❤️🐀
THank you triple D.
A tale well told that both delighted and terrified me. Decades ago, I had a trap like that for mice and loaned it to a friend who didn't quite have his shit together. It was more of a metal box than a cage, and he caught a mouse and then left the trap sitting on his stove and... I think you can guess how things went after that. So he was more Joseph Goebbels than you were for sure, if that gives you any comfort.
And this made me actually, literally laugh out loud:
“Honey…Don’t get too comfortable . You have to get back in the car and drive me 10 miles from here so I can relocate a rat.”
Thank you! Tho make sure I never meet that awful friend of yours.
Sadly, he died several years ago. Sorry for the downer reply... I loved this post and it made me remember both his great qualities and his bad ones as I quivered with rat-related terror.
I was LITERALLY laughing out loud during the car scene!!!! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Hooray. I made Smithberg laugh. Yipeee.
Out loud!!!
I hate myself for laughing so hard at the Curly of the Three Stooges sounds. Which you wrote so perfectly, I could see him.
And you didn’t scream when Citizen 🐀 was on your shoulder. Or the hub’s.
You are brave, kind, loving and compassionate. And hysterically funny.
You do get the Pizza 🍕 🐀 Rat Humane Award of the Century.
And now, thanks to you, I know why the rat I dropped off in 1976 about 20 blocks from my apartment in Park Slope only one mile)returned. Love between animals and their humans is a beautiful thing.
You are genius.
Awww.Thanks. But If I'm a genius, I think I better stop writing dumb shit on here and get to work on climate change.
Start on climate change here ?
And caring for and about animals isn’t dumb shit, even though we really need help on climate change.
I hope he at least has the decency to tell his grandchildren that you inspired him to adopt a healthy hydration routine.
Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.
Now I'm picturing a rat with a big fat stogie laughing his naked tail off watching you from the front porch as you write this...
Merrill, you sure do tell a good story. It has everything, empathy, a wild animal, a couples argument in the middle of the night, and the mistaken notion that rat cage locks are infallible. I laughed, I cried, I suddenly craved cheese.
Haaa. Thank you Valerie!
Love this story. I once had an unexpectedly loose ferret run under my brake pedal, which caused obvious problems, but at least he was my (totally plague-free) ferret!
Wow. Lucky you. I would like to have a ferret!
I'm a bit late to the party but this is one of the best stories ever. At the moment I am feeding a tiny little mouse under my dresser in hopes that I will be able to capture and relocate it later. I'm in a hotel for the elderly and do not tell anyone as they will think horrible thoughts about me. There were two but the janitor set traps and when I found the one murdered, I threw the traps away. I fed feral cats and raccoons in the woods for 30 years before I moved here so I can't help myself. Anyway....thanks for the delightful read.