I am not lying. After reading these comments, I just walked through the kitchen past a box of Harry and David’s Chocolate Moose Munch, a bag of tortilla chips, a bag of Pita Chips, and opened the vegetable drawer of my fridge, which had it it a limp head of lettuce and a miserable little bag of peeled baby carrots. They looked great! Just scrumptious! That’s what I’m eating now.
I belong to so many cooking communtites because I am a private chef, and I have been communicating with a pastry chef in Australia. I am a "savory" cook, although I have been known to make a croquembouche a few times. I want his pastries and he wants my savories, so I told him that I had figured out a way to feed him through my computer. He said FINALLY, somebody has figured that out. I said to him, What dish do you want? He said, I want your Portuguese Tuna Puttanesca. I said, Okay but give me 30 minutes...but keep your computer on and clean your glasses, because you will be eating with your eyes.
As a food explorer, blogger and author of a children’s vegetable cookbook I can confirm…the eye eats. Veggies just never get the reception they should so the advertising went way overboard, in my opinion. I’m a foodie but it’s good to keep our eye on the carrot. We eat to live but we also eat to celebrate. Balancing food intake can be a challenge. Hence I have gone mad over veggies, why not eat what’s likely to be your best bet? In the last few years I have prepared over a thousand new vegetable recipes and I’m hooked. There seems to be no end in sight for beautiful, tasty vegetable dishes. Fill yourself up! Words from the veggie pusher.
Agree.Except for one NOTABLE exception: a recipe I read where they claimed you could roast carrots for a hot-dog substitution. No. No you can NOT do that. That is NOT a hotdog substitution. And I speak as one who doesn't eat or even LIKE hot dogs. But if you DO like hot dogs and are craving one...a roasted carrot in a hot dog bun will just make you lose the will to live.
Look at this incredible butternut squash soup with chestnuts and micro greens. The JOY all that behold it feel! You know you don’t deserve that. Just eat your wasabi peas and starve your way to skinny.
I’m still trying to channel your sense of humor and genius as I plod through the online world. Of course, if I am ever successful I will likely laugh so hard that I get a hernia. Thank you so much for sharing your hilarious way of seeing the world. It makes it easier to keep going.
This is the best piece of writing I've read in a while. Thank you for the laughs!
I am not lying. After reading these comments, I just walked through the kitchen past a box of Harry and David’s Chocolate Moose Munch, a bag of tortilla chips, a bag of Pita Chips, and opened the vegetable drawer of my fridge, which had it it a limp head of lettuce and a miserable little bag of peeled baby carrots. They looked great! Just scrumptious! That’s what I’m eating now.
I think in the past you have been eating your lettuce too soon.It's important to let it
become limp first!
Got it. Thanks.
I belong to so many cooking communtites because I am a private chef, and I have been communicating with a pastry chef in Australia. I am a "savory" cook, although I have been known to make a croquembouche a few times. I want his pastries and he wants my savories, so I told him that I had figured out a way to feed him through my computer. He said FINALLY, somebody has figured that out. I said to him, What dish do you want? He said, I want your Portuguese Tuna Puttanesca. I said, Okay but give me 30 minutes...but keep your computer on and clean your glasses, because you will be eating with your eyes.
Wow. You are the RIGHT person to have as a friend!
O
M
G
Merrill! Hilarious!!!!!!!
I wonder if these images are AI-generated? That might explain the implicit gender roles.
As a food explorer, blogger and author of a children’s vegetable cookbook I can confirm…the eye eats. Veggies just never get the reception they should so the advertising went way overboard, in my opinion. I’m a foodie but it’s good to keep our eye on the carrot. We eat to live but we also eat to celebrate. Balancing food intake can be a challenge. Hence I have gone mad over veggies, why not eat what’s likely to be your best bet? In the last few years I have prepared over a thousand new vegetable recipes and I’m hooked. There seems to be no end in sight for beautiful, tasty vegetable dishes. Fill yourself up! Words from the veggie pusher.
Agree.Except for one NOTABLE exception: a recipe I read where they claimed you could roast carrots for a hot-dog substitution. No. No you can NOT do that. That is NOT a hotdog substitution. And I speak as one who doesn't eat or even LIKE hot dogs. But if you DO like hot dogs and are craving one...a roasted carrot in a hot dog bun will just make you lose the will to live.
Agreed. I actually tried a recipe for a carrot dog….not good. I confess I
As a New Yorker, I still love a good dog…..pile up the kraut please.
Merrill? This is hilarious.
I am suddenly overwhelmed by the urge to visit my local produce department and purchase an overloading paper grocery bag full of vegetables!
Proceed but dont forget to take a photo of yourself smiling like you just won the lotto.
How can I not? I just LOVE fresh bok choy
The 2 guys without heads are obviously on dating sites.
Haaa. That never occurred to me. Or else they are running for office.
The guy with the bread is the happiest because he knows he’s going to eat that old vegan standby, the salad sandwich.
axis...not access.
Just to see such unbridled joy makes me forget I was hungry
That is a very good idea for a best-selling diet book. Get busy!
Look at this incredible butternut squash soup with chestnuts and micro greens. The JOY all that behold it feel! You know you don’t deserve that. Just eat your wasabi peas and starve your way to skinny.
It writes itself!
I’m still trying to channel your sense of humor and genius as I plod through the online world. Of course, if I am ever successful I will likely laugh so hard that I get a hernia. Thank you so much for sharing your hilarious way of seeing the world. It makes it easier to keep going.
Turns out being delusional is sometimes a useful approach.But thank you.
This one made me chortle out loud a LOT. "Here. I bought all the colors of peppers , as every man knows he must do." I DIEDS.
YAY. I have amused The Queen of Substack! Thank you Queen.
You always amuse and inspire, my Lady.
nutty...
waiting for someone else to complete this comment 🙃😉
Oh. My. God. Could not stop laughing. The out loud kind.
“Aaaah…lettuce!” I’m still laughing. You are one funny vegan!