I often bully myself into attending events as well. Luckily the smile/drink/corner combo is a power-move and can get anyone through most social situations with or without twin flame.
Parties are like having to present a paper end of semester to the entire neuroendocrinology class except they are close enough to touch you and are pretty boozed up. Take the bull by the horns and dream up a family emergency, print enough copies for the class, dont show; but listen to how its received by lurking in the hallway outside of class. Then run away.
Being raised by people who instructed "don't speak until you are spoken to" is where I lay the blame for my social awkwardness at parties. I've learned that the best extrication plan relies on not carpooling (so limit drinking to one) and the relief upon arriving home is usually the best part of the entire day. In unity.
Yay. Some kinds of "Fun" have a lot of trap doors. And yes...that speak when spoken to thing was pretty wacky. Or how about "children should be seen and not heard."?
Yes! To be seen and not heard was another of the verbal straps they laid to suppress development of a healthy, outgoing personality. The only positive takeaway I can give is that I raised my kids opposite, in nearly every way, and they are engaging and generous adults with none of my introverted hangups.💙
This is so awful. I think my mother was raised that way and didn’t do that to us. It was the 70’s, so there were other problems, but yeah, we were allowed to talk.
Thank you Brian. You are not banned. I freaked out. A whole bunch of people jumped ship after I posted that piece. I have no idea why but it unnerved me. I never really understand what people want. I knew that piece wasnt exactly pure comedy. It was kind of too analytical and cerebral I guess? Too dark? I dont know. But I am kind of ashamed of myself for censoring myself. I mean, I am writing this stuff for free....I have to get past feelings of trying to please someone. I guess I need to work on that.
Thank you for that amazing compliment. I have never had a whole bunch of people bail before. I guess its time to get used to it and continue on my merry way. Trying to please an audience is a habit I need to get rid of. Maybe I have it because I used to perform and if an audience didn't laugh at a joke, I would throw it out.
My old college roomie was Munch's grand nephew. Upon his arguing a point I didnt care for I would place hands on cheeks, tilt my head and form an " O " with my mouth for which I received a healthy F you or a slice of pizza to dodge.
The demitasse is on its way to Charlies house as I type😊
I am going to man-up and re-post it. The people who want to leave can leave. I have no idea what it is about that post that is polarizing but it is time to stop caring.
So funny. I always search for a dog the moment I arrive. Then I get upset when he/she inevitably wants to mingle and not huddle in the corner all night.
Merrill I’m sitting on the edge of my bed and staring at my phone and laughing to myself because this is truly hilarious. So funny!
I remember our Camp 4 parties. Those were attended by a group of introverts in beanies surrounding a crackling campfire, drinking the good stuff: Almaden jug wine. Folksinger guys, cute ones, sang songs about maidens that were constantly sorrowful.
Oh the sorrowful maidens of yesteryear. YOU, my friend, are not an introvert (I dont think). I recall you being good at parties. Of course, once drunk everyone is good at parties until the mental inventories the next day.
You are correct. I wasn’t an introvert. The introverts in beanies were the rock climbers. They sat in the flickering firelight. Good lookin’ bunch. I did not dance in my minidress on the picnic table. Not saying it didn’t cross my mind.
I got your latest hilarious and genius post in my email, about dissociative coping and I laughed so hard I almost peed. But I couldn’t find it here on Substack to tell you. Thank you for my new favorite way to cope which I think I sort of did a bit on accident but now I will do on purpose.
Wow. Thank you. I lost a whole bunch of people when I posted that piece and I freaked out and thought I had done something unfortunate that was going to alienate people and I took it down. Gotta say I liked that piece, tho I knew it wasnt really pure comedy. I dont know why it had such a bad effect. Maybe too cerebral? But it was unnerving to see people bailing. And I am kind of ashamed of myself for caring.
I have never really figured out what people do or do not want. And I have often felt it was a shortcoming. But I also believe that if you start to write to please people, you are going to lose all your instincts. So...I guess I need to work on this.
Haaaaaa. People dont even introduce people at parties any more. When I was in grade school, they used to tell you, as the hostess, that it was your job to go up to two people and say "Hi. Mermcoelho, this is Mike. He likes pie too!" and then you have a shred of thing in common.
I often bully myself into attending events as well. Luckily the smile/drink/corner combo is a power-move and can get anyone through most social situations with or without twin flame.
I completely relate!
Parties are like having to present a paper end of semester to the entire neuroendocrinology class except they are close enough to touch you and are pretty boozed up. Take the bull by the horns and dream up a family emergency, print enough copies for the class, dont show; but listen to how its received by lurking in the hallway outside of class. Then run away.
i got a B+
Being raised by people who instructed "don't speak until you are spoken to" is where I lay the blame for my social awkwardness at parties. I've learned that the best extrication plan relies on not carpooling (so limit drinking to one) and the relief upon arriving home is usually the best part of the entire day. In unity.
Yay. Some kinds of "Fun" have a lot of trap doors. And yes...that speak when spoken to thing was pretty wacky. Or how about "children should be seen and not heard."?
Yes! To be seen and not heard was another of the verbal straps they laid to suppress development of a healthy, outgoing personality. The only positive takeaway I can give is that I raised my kids opposite, in nearly every way, and they are engaging and generous adults with none of my introverted hangups.💙
This is so awful. I think my mother was raised that way and didn’t do that to us. It was the 70’s, so there were other problems, but yeah, we were allowed to talk.
You were HEATHENS!
Attempted to share
Panning for jokes with my yule-angst pals got
me “page not found “ So apparently I am banned. it was just a matter of time, same as the boy scouts,… too rowdy.
Panning for jokes was delightful and
tickled my mind with humor molecules.
Everything is copy and if I may,
Everything is coping..?
thank you!
Thank you Brian. You are not banned. I freaked out. A whole bunch of people jumped ship after I posted that piece. I have no idea why but it unnerved me. I never really understand what people want. I knew that piece wasnt exactly pure comedy. It was kind of too analytical and cerebral I guess? Too dark? I dont know. But I am kind of ashamed of myself for censoring myself. I mean, I am writing this stuff for free....I have to get past feelings of trying to please someone. I guess I need to work on that.
I found the piece insightful, truly funny with a logical appeal.
Each paragraph had me grinning
and nodding approval. I find it hard to believe some people jumped ship.
I felt lucky to read it
Thank you for that amazing compliment. I have never had a whole bunch of people bail before. I guess its time to get used to it and continue on my merry way. Trying to please an audience is a habit I need to get rid of. Maybe I have it because I used to perform and if an audience didn't laugh at a joke, I would throw it out.
Most welcome and thank you for the Etsy photos!
My old college roomie was Munch's grand nephew. Upon his arguing a point I didnt care for I would place hands on cheeks, tilt my head and form an " O " with my mouth for which I received a healthy F you or a slice of pizza to dodge.
The demitasse is on its way to Charlies house as I type😊
I have the Panning For Jokes email. Now that it's a collectors item, I'm going to print it and have it framed. Thank you.
I am going to man-up and re-post it. The people who want to leave can leave. I have no idea what it is about that post that is polarizing but it is time to stop caring.
Bravo, Merrill Markoe! As a wise person once said, if someone doesn't get it, it's not on you, it's on them.
It’s not just you. I couldn’t find it either.
So funny. I always search for a dog the moment I arrive. Then I get upset when he/she inevitably wants to mingle and not huddle in the corner all night.
I never thought of that. Good plan!
Merrill I’m sitting on the edge of my bed and staring at my phone and laughing to myself because this is truly hilarious. So funny!
I remember our Camp 4 parties. Those were attended by a group of introverts in beanies surrounding a crackling campfire, drinking the good stuff: Almaden jug wine. Folksinger guys, cute ones, sang songs about maidens that were constantly sorrowful.
Fun!
Oh the sorrowful maidens of yesteryear. YOU, my friend, are not an introvert (I dont think). I recall you being good at parties. Of course, once drunk everyone is good at parties until the mental inventories the next day.
You are correct. I wasn’t an introvert. The introverts in beanies were the rock climbers. They sat in the flickering firelight. Good lookin’ bunch. I did not dance in my minidress on the picnic table. Not saying it didn’t cross my mind.
I’m an introvert now though.
Shh. No more talking to me.
I feel inspired by the coffee commercial tho.
Whoa, I was already party adverse but the twin flame concept has me freaked way out.
omg merrill "The pan guy" just too too on point. xoxox PP
Hey Cat Cafe. THANKS.
I got your latest hilarious and genius post in my email, about dissociative coping and I laughed so hard I almost peed. But I couldn’t find it here on Substack to tell you. Thank you for my new favorite way to cope which I think I sort of did a bit on accident but now I will do on purpose.
Wow. Thank you. I lost a whole bunch of people when I posted that piece and I freaked out and thought I had done something unfortunate that was going to alienate people and I took it down. Gotta say I liked that piece, tho I knew it wasnt really pure comedy. I dont know why it had such a bad effect. Maybe too cerebral? But it was unnerving to see people bailing. And I am kind of ashamed of myself for caring.
Wow. I’m surprised. I thought the whole meta thing was amazing. Maybe not everyone got it? Humor on many levels may freak people out?
I have never really figured out what people do or do not want. And I have often felt it was a shortcoming. But I also believe that if you start to write to please people, you are going to lose all your instincts. So...I guess I need to work on this.
It’s got be hard thinking in public.
Oh, I actually like parties. I mean, once I get there. Is there anything we party-likers can do to help? I would never leave you stuck with pan guy.
Edited for spelling
Haaaaaa. People dont even introduce people at parties any more. When I was in grade school, they used to tell you, as the hostess, that it was your job to go up to two people and say "Hi. Mermcoelho, this is Mike. He likes pie too!" and then you have a shred of thing in common.
Yikes.
1000% Boomer Gold.